Babies and llama's

Saw the new doctor today. She is very sweet. Almost too sweet.....you know, one of those. The heartbeat was 140...hmmmm. Could be a boy. I have an ultrasound appt. on the 8th. We will find out then. But, I can't wait. At first, I didn't want to know, but now I want to.

Do you know what is the freakiest looking thing at 1:30 a.m. in your car headlights?........

A FUCKING LLAMA!

Yeah, as fucked up as that sounds. I work in the middle of nowhere. Someone dropped this 3 acre plant in the middle of farm country. And just down the road, the first turn I make on my 30 minute ride home, is a farm with goats, horses, and llama's. Yeah...imagine it...their necks are all long...and their eyes are 3 foot above the normal deer. And they are all white.....dude.....it looks like a fucking sasquatch, with these big red eyes in your headlights. I know they are there. At least I pass them in the daylight, on my way to work. But, in the dark......whoa.....different story. My heart jumps into my throat every time I see it, and then I remember and laugh to myself. Fucking llamas!

Nature is crazy...

So, I took these pictures with my phone, so they are not that great. But I thought it was neat. Where I work, it is a giant plant with not much grass or anything. Just concrete as far as you can see. Although it is set in the middle of the country. It has taken over all of the land surrounding it. I noticed yesterday, there was a lonely dandelion growing from a crack in the wall. How it got there, I don't know, but I thought it was neat.

Big Ass Mouth

The trip to Reno was pretty uneventful. Didn't win any money, didn't lose a whole lot either. Bowled in the national bowling stadium, which is really overwhelming. 3 story bowling alley, 80 lanes. Very intimidating. I bowled my average, nothing spectacular. It snowed the day we got there. It snowed pretty heavy, I would say maybe 3-4 inches. Of course there, the roads were closed and people put chains on their vehicles. Here in Michigan, this would have been an ordinary day.

We stayed at Circus Circus, which I will never do again. When did it become a family event to go to the casino? Hundreds of children running everywhere. Some even had their babies there. None of them supervised. It was as if the parents dropped them off and went gambling. I will not stay there again.

Reno is not the place you want to go to if you are 5 months pregnant. If you can't party all night long, it really is no fun.

It was Mr. Perfect and I, and 3 other girls, on my bowling team. They wanted to party all night long, and I did not. Mr. Perfect respected my condition, and did whatever I wanted to do. He took naps with me. And when we did gamble, I gave him all of my drinks. He was actually good, better than most I bet, in a city of sin with their very pregnant girlfriends.

One of the girls, I will not mention names. I am sure she doesn't read this, but stranger things have happened. We will call her BAM. She was very negative towards Mr. Perfect the entire time. She said things, that made me very mad. She is friends with Shitbag's(EX's) family, or as I like to call them, the dark side. Anyway, she said things like...."you know, you don't have to marry him just cause he bought you that ring."........Or......."Are you happy?".....Or...."is he going to be able to take care of you?"......all sorts of bullshit like this. What she doesn't realize, is that Shitbag never did, nor would ever do, any of these things. I reassured her the first couple stupid questions, that yes I am happy. After that, I just told her to shut the fuck up. At first, I thought it was just because she cared, and some of it was. But some of it, was way to intrusive to just be "thoughtful". She was digging for something, she was not going to find.

And maybe if she does read this......she will know....
I am marrying Mr. Perfect because I love him with all of my heart. More than I have ever loved anyone in my life. I am not marrying him for his money or for any other superficial reason. I am more happy than I have ever been in my life. He is everything I have always wanted and more. I am marrying him because he loves me and takes care of me. I could not ask for anything more.

And the next time she goes off on one of these fucking rants about whether I am happy or not, I think I will just tell her to fuck off. I don't need people like this in my life. Everyone else is happy for me. Everyone else can see how much we love each other. Why can't she? I think she refuses to.

I would like to put some pictures of the mountains from our hotel room up, but my internet connection at home is currently cut off. I am not sure why, I think it has something to do with the bill. So until I get that all fingered out there will probably be no pictures this week, for I must post at work.

I can definately feel the baby moving now. That is really fucking cool. I can't wait for Mr. Perfect to be able to feel it. I have an appt. on Friday. She will probably set me up with an ultrasound too. So we may find out what it is.....any bets?

Going Going Gone...

Goodbye til next week. I am going to RENO! I am going to try not to gamble all of my money away. And eat lots of good buffets! Oh and bowl too, I always forget about that part!

Happy Easter to everyone!

Toe wierdos

I left early today to go to the store. I had to make a trip to Meijer to get some last minute things for our trip to Reno next week. Blue calls me on the way to the store....

Blue: "I think I broke my toe. How can you tell if you toe is broken?"

Me: "Can you move it?"

Blue: "Not very well. It hurts like hell. J just left and the baby is upstairs crying."

Me: "Is it swollen around the joint area? Can you feel the bone to move it, or is it limp?"

Blue: "Yes it is swollen, I wiggled it, but I can't walk very well."

Meanwhile there are sounds of her ohhh-ing and ahhh-ing.

Blue: "Ok well I will let you get your stuff done, I just wanted to call you to see if my toe was broken..... "

I thought I had a major emergency on my hands. I am glad that it wasn't broken, or that I could determine whether her toe was broken over the phone. I am glad that I am her "phone-a-nurse". Or that she trusted me to tell her it was or wasn't broken over the phone. I of course, do the same thing to her.......yeah....that is how we work.

Rings and things

So there it is! I got home from work last night and Mr. Perfect had my family and his family waiting in my kitchen for me! Scared the shit out of me! And he proposed to me in the middle of the kitchen in the middle of all of our family! I wasn't sure what emotion to show when that many people are watching you! I cried and said....mm okay! I mean I know I wanted to say yes, but it just didn't come out right. But everyone got the picture! I was so shocked the words wouldn't form. He was shaking and nervous too. Of all of the ways I would have ever thought he would propose to me, that was definitely not it. I thought he was way to shy to pull something like that over. But you have to hand it to him. He did a wonderful job, not only with the planning of it all by himself. But, keeping it quiet. It was nice. I don't pay attention to stuff, he could have pulled anything over on me. I am still a little overwhelmed by it. I couldn't go to sleep until 2am. I don't get home from work until 11:30 pm. I couldn't believe that many people were up past their bedtimes, just to be there. My parents and brother were there. My grandma, my aunt and her husband and children, along with their significant others. His mother and stepfather, grandparents, blue and her husband. It was a full crowd. He said he wanted to make it memorable. I will definitely never forget this!

p.s. rings are really hard to take pictures of!

Wedding fat

So we have made a decision on where the wedding will be. It is the place I talked about a few days ago. It is a really pretty place. They showed us some more pictures of other weddings, and it is really great. There is no set-up or take-down. The set it all up, you can, of course, have your own decorating touches, but otherwise, worry free.

And another cool thing about the place is that they have a playground. You know how kids get bored and are kind of irritating at things like that. Well here, you don't have to worry about it. They have animals and things too. It is really unique.

It is not going to rain that day. But for some reason, should it rain. They will move the ceremony upstairs in the top of the barn. It is really pretty up there too.

I am excited now. It makes it all seem a reality. I am going to be spending the rest of my life with this person. I am totally fine with that, but just have never thought that (for real) about anyone. I always call it the "but factor". Meaning...."I really love them but.....". I don't have that with Mr. Perfect. I knew somehow in the back of my mind, with everyone else that it wasn't going to be it. I always did things on my own. I always made sure I was going to be ok, should anything happen. That is the way I planned everything. Maybe that is why some of my ex's have called me selfish. But, in reality I have come out of all of those relationships ok. I bought my house, on my own. I made MY life ok. Whether with or without them. I never included them in all of my decisions. But, with Mr. Perfect, he is included in everything. I always ask him his opinion. Because, for some reason, I know. I know that he will be there to share it with me forever.

I guess that is the way it is supposed to be. I just never had that. Who knew....I thought I had that whole LOVE thing figured out, and damn......I guess I never really had it.

But now, on to the dress shopping! I told Mr. Perfect on Saturday...."You know there is one less thing I have to worry about for the wedding. At any normal time, I would be working out like a maniac, trying to be in perfect shape for my wedding day. But, I guess that doesn't have to concern me huh? I guess they will really need to play....Here comes the bride, far, fat, and wide!"

Nasty Vanessa

Another reason (#203) that Johnny Depp should just come and get me......LOOK AT HER FUCKING TEETH~ She is french, and that will excuse her from a cavity or 2, but DAMN WOMAN! And he doesn't see this? He kisses that? He lets that diseased mouth near him? Or better yet, he can just ditch her and come check out my chompers....not one cavity, ever! Can he not get her some dental work or something? Maybe this is why he has not married her, waiting for her teeth to clear up.

Dresses and panic

Blue and I went shopping this morning for dresses. We originally went for a blue one, but most formal dresses of every color, blue included.....are a bit over-the-top. But we found one, it was green. Sort of a grass green, and it has jewels around the rib cage, it's neat. And she looks good in it too. That is most important to me. I am not one of those women that just goes and pick stuff, awful or not, and makes people wear it. I want them to be included, if I don't like it, I'll tell ya, but I think all of that stuff is negotiable. Not everyone looks good in everything. I am definitely not a BrideZilla.

We are going to look at the place tomorrow. I am so nervous about that, most of all. I don't know why. I guess I just want it to be perfect, and I never get what I want. So SOMEthing will be wrong with it, of course.

Blue and I also looked at rings today too. I have never done that before. That was weird. I have never worn anything with a stone in it, in my life. It is hard to pick one. I just know it has to be one that doesn't stick out real far, the setting. Cause I know I will break it. I just know it. Everyone tells me I won't, but I know I will. I break everything.

This is all becoming a reality faster than I expected. I am excited, but also nervous. It is not the part about being in love and wanting to get married. I am just nervous most of the time anyway. I am sure to have at least 1-5 panic attacks before this is all over, I am sure of it.

Pretty wedding

In the hunt for places to get married, I think I have found it. We are going to look at it on Saturday morning. It is a place that I pass by every day on my way to work. I have seen them set up parties and such in the summer time, but I didn't know they did weddings until recently. It is a really cool old farm. We will be able to get married outside, and have the reception outside, right in the same place.

This is where the ceremony will be...






And the reception will be in a pavillion off of the barn, you can have it covered or not covered...


I have sort of fell in love with it. I have kind of stopped looking. I have always wanted an outside wedding. I am 98% sure this is where I want to have it. It is so pretty. Even for a shotgun wedding with a 7 month pregnant woman....wish me luck!

Chihuahua's and babies

Well the people upstairs are buying a house. So this leaves me with an empty apartment again. I have a possible person who wants to move in, and hopefully this works out. I finally got the rent coming in regular and all the bills caught up, and here we go again. Especially with a wedding and a baby coming up, I would like to be able to count on that money.

Oh and speaking of the people upstairs, they have Chihuahua's. And right after they told me they would be moving out in a month. My dog, nimbus, somehow slipped past me in the doorway, and went after them. It was great. I actually wanted him to rip one of their little ratheads off.

I am feeling the baby move now. Little bubbles of sorts. It's neat. Mr. Perfect said....when I asked him how many children he would like to have "I think we should go until we get a boy". Because every man wants a son I suppose. But, that could be disastrous. I could see us having 8 daughters and still going.

I have been actively looking for all of this wedding stuff. It really seems like such a beautiful dream, until it is a reality. Then it is a lot of work. I never realized how much work, until now. Dresses, rings, halls, food, invitations, guestlists, music, alcohol, flowers...........god. I know in the end, it is all worth it, but damn. I wish I was one of those rich people who could just hire someone to do it all, or better yet........someone paid me to do it all!